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Rank: Triarii

Yay! Let’s hate on Java! I reckon Object Orientated programming in general has generated infinite possibilities for doing things in such a convoluted way that if you’re not careful you’ll disappear so far into your own belly button that you get lost and no one will be able to pull you out of that mess because it makes no sense to anyone but you. But not the “you” you are today, the “you” 6 months ago, “sleep deprived, caffeine fuelled you”. The more excited developers get about their code, the more I worry about this. Java just gives these OOP freaks training wheels.

Java in particular and the whole Continuous Integration problem I find hilarious. People have earned PHD’s solving a problem that’s rooted in the fact that Java projects must be rebuilt from scratch to see the results when all you’ve done is changed one line of code. The process takes too long for a development team to collaborate together on a single centralised monolithic development environment. Though I admit, it’s becoming harder to work on a centralised development environment as more software development teams are themselves distributed, but if do you have that luxury, it’s such fun listening to people talk about the epic Continuous Integration solution they just wasted days or weeks cobbling together. Then again a few months later when they come to talk about the fact that guys just weren’t using it, or what a pain it is maintaining because one of the open source components they used stopped working and that project’s now abandoned.

Also, “deprecation”. What the heck!? Who does that except for someone that wants to guarantee their own existence for the next few decades. “Method X worked fine for many developers over the years, hundreds or thousands of business systems now rely on it, but you know what? We’re going to introduce a timebomb into all of those systems because one of these bleeding edge bellybutton explorers prolly wrote some whitepaper that was cool and convinced the rest of the core Java team that the old behaviour could be improved or maybe just the wording was slightly irritating.”